Redeeming Bethany
by Youko Demon
Summary: The 2nd chapter, you find out Draco likes to burn things and the longest way to the hospital wing. In the 3rd, you find out what he burned. 4th chapter up, down and sideways. Chapter 5 is up. The stupid reason why Draco hates kids and Rus finds Santa.
1. Enter Severus and Bethany

Okay, this is my first HP fic. I don't have much to say about this but I'm just making it all up as I go along.

I know it's probably not as original as you'd like it to be but… yeah, if you don't wanna read it, I'm not gonna make you.

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Severus Snape sat at the large desk in the office of his private quarters, wondering what potion to teach his 6th year Gryffindor/Slytherin class the next week. He always had to put more thought into this particular class as it seemed to include his best and his worst students.

After devising a new seating plan (with Mr Longbottom as far from his desk as possible and Mr Potter and Mr Malfoy as far from each other as possible) he decided on a slightly difficult voice changing potion.

'The only problematic ingredients (meaning the most likely ingredients for Mr Longbottom to blow up) will be added at the beginning of the potion therefore I'll still be near the front of the class and won't be anywhere near him when he does it.'

With that, he finished up the rest of his lesson plans and went to bed.

The same night, Bethany Collins, a 6th year Slytherin student, sat in her shared dorm room, finishing her charms assignment due a couple of days later, once finished the written task of the assignment, she charmed the parchment into a ceramic statue of a fighting fish, that being the last task of the assignment, to make the parchment a statue out of any medium except parchment.

Having finished her homework for the night, she pulled a sketch pad and her pencils to continue her work on her favourite hobby, Writing and drawing manga. Writing and drawing were always an escape from the real world for Bethany, once she started writing, it didn't matter who she was, what was in her past or her (obvious to her) unchangeable future, she could just get lost in the plot and not return for quite some time.

The story line of the currently being created manga centred on the life of a student who was practically invisible to all around her. Bethany felt odd to be making a story about herself, and even a little sad to be making up plots to make her life seem more interesting and hiding what she didn't want to show.

Bethany didn't have any friends, at school or at home. At home, she was a pretty much a slave and at school, she was a shadow, hiding the fact that she was more of a slave than her father's daughter.

The only problem with being a shadow is that everyone walks right by you and you can't seem to join them. She spent so much time trying to blend in and be 'un-noticeable' and average that she was now seemingly invisible to the rest of the population.

She couldn't really help it though, although she wouldn't mind one friend at least, she didn't like the thought of having to lie to that friend all the time.

Bethany wasn't called on in class to answer questions, but she didn't mind that as she would always get embarrassed and nervous with the attention on her. What she didn't appreciate thought was being ignored by everyone. She'd like so much for someone to just say 'hi' to her when they passed her in a hall. She knew that she didn't speak loudly but she also knew that they were not so deaf as to not be able to hear her. Slytherins, almost by rule, were not the nicest of people, but she would hope that at least her room mates would say more to her than 'Hurry up in the shower' or 'lock the door on your way out'.

Sighing, she put away all her books and pencils and got ready for bed, loosely braiding her medium length brown hair. Bethany kept it that way so it wouldn't stand out for being too short or long, just average. She didn't really understand why but she seemed to get tired earlier and awaken later than the other students.

Shrugging it off as something to think about later, as always, she went to bed.

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So check it out, I stopped thinking about putting the first two chapters together and actually did it. Death to procrastination! Although, it's not actually me that's doing this…

I'd like to say that I want you to review but it doesn't really matter, I'd just like to know who's actually taken the time to read this.

Thanks.


	2. Smoke and mirrors

I own nothing. Literally...its quite sad really... 

If the start of this story seems to be written a little bit differently from the middle and end, thats because my best friend helped (or more like worte the whole thing).

Sorry for not updating in ages,but don't really think anyone is reading this so I guess it dosnt really matter.

Enjoy.

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The week had passed quietly and as normal (as normal as Hogwarts could get), and professor Snape was just sitting down to his morning cup of tea, he was never one for breakfast. It was a nice day out and looked to stay that way for a while but that didn't stop the professor from dreading his most hated class, 6th year potions with his Gryffindor/Slytherin class.

No matter what he tried, something always happened and he was seriously thinking of asking the headmaster to re-locate some of the students to other classes. What was Dumbledore thinking anyway? If you put students such as Potter, Malfoy, Longbottom and Weasley together, then it's just asking for trouble.

Finishing his tea, Snape decided that he may as well get the day over and done with, he saw no point in delaying the inevitable. The sooner he finished his other classes, the sooner he could be done with the class of lions and snakes.

Leaving the great hall with his usual billowing robes, professor Snape headed for his beloved dungeons.

Bethany's week was normal… again. But today, instead of her internal clock normally waking her up 30mins before her first class, she slept until she was startled awake by one of her room mates as she hurried to retrieve a book she'd forgotten. The girl, Ashira, looked at Bethany, saw that she'd only just awoken and burst out laughing.

'Hahaha, you've only got 10mins before your first class and I know you're not sick. I sure hope you don't trip on your way to class.' The Slytherin sneered as she ran out of the room.

Moving as fast as possible, Bethany decided against tying her hair in its usual bun and just left it down. It would annoy her but she didn't want to be late.

As expected, Ashira had left random items on the floor. She would've tripped if she wasn't standing so close to the wall. She hit her head instead.

Only just getting to her Magical History lesson on time, Bethany took her seat at the back of the class and nearly passed out. She'd never run so fast or far in her life, even with the back of her head throbbing painfully, and now she could hardly breathe properly.

'This is gonna be a great day' Bethany sarcastically thought as the class began.

It took only another ten minutes for the boredom to fully set in, on top of the throbbing in her temple from her injuries. The ground seemed closer than it was meant to be and Bethany found herself trying desperately to keep herself awake.

'_Internal conflict within the tribes of the Ancient Iceni caused trouble throughout northern Wales in the earlier parts of the fifth Century…' _

Bethany suddenly jerked her head up, shaking cobwebs out of her mind. I should have eaten something, she commiserated, putting her head in her hand. No one will notice. No one ever notices me…

Bethany saw blackness for what seemed like only a moment, it was interrupted rather rudely by an elbow belonging to whoever the hell was sitting beside her. 'What?' she asked a little too loudly, started. A blonde boy to her left was staring at her, his offending elbow now back on his own desk. Bethany realised only a moment later, that he was not the only one. 'Err…'

Ashira just happened to be sitting in front of her, smirking superiorly. 'Feeling alright?' she asked scathingly. 'You look tired, love,' she continued as others turned to face Bethany, who was rapidly feeling colour rising to her cheeks. 'You really should get some more sleep.' The girl next to her laughed just as Professor Binns realised that there was something going on. Bethany had had her mouth open to say something, but found herself faltering. She had never been good with insults. She kept them in her head where they slowly morphed into violent fantasies of retribution. She would probably create a new character for her manga tonight, a blonde one with no heart. She would kill her off without a thought.

'Can I interest you girls in a detention?' Ashira whipped her head around, long blonde hair fanning out around her now innocent face. 'Sorry Sir,' she began sweetly, suddenly seeing her opportunity to get out of the most boring class known to man. 'Poor Beth isn't feeling well, maybe I should take her to—'

'I'll take her to the hospital wing.'

Bethany felt a wave of nausea flow through her body as she was yanked to her feet suddenly. 'I'm fine,' she lied immediately, her hand reaching out to grab at her desk to steady herself.

'You are not,' the boy said quietly, almost accusingly, requesting again that he be allowed to escort Bethany to the hospital wing. Bethany remained quiet, letting her hair fall over her face rather than let anyone else see her reddening face. She closed her eyes for a moment, knowing she was never going to live this down. This day was quickly forming into another one of those days in her life that began badly, continued even worse, and ended with her charming the curtains of her four-poster bed to keep out the taunts from the other girls in her dormitory. Bethany felt tears stinging behind her eyes.

'Come on.' Bethany felt her arm being tugged again, this time in the direction of the door. For a moment she saw the contemptuous face of Ashira following her, a look somewhere between anger and sickening bliss upon seeing her so ill. Bethany had not even registered who had snapped up the hall pass and guided her out of the room.

'You look high,' the boy commented conversationally. Bethany made a reply in the form of pushing his arm away from her. 'Don't touch me, Malfoy.'

'Suit yourself, _Beth_,' he answered, putting her hands up in sarcastic defence. 'Do what you like.' Bethany cringed. She would have liked to push him into the wall and told him never to call her that again. Beth was a name for grandmothers and people who liked to crochet tea cosies. She kept her mouth shut instead. _That'll show him, _she mused sarcastically inside her head. _The old 'keep your mouth shut for results' game plan._ It had never worked in the past, but it was just easier.

'Don't you talk?'

'No,' Bethany answered, reaching out for a banister as one of the stair cases decided quite cruelly that it was going to start moving beneath their feet. 'Not really.' She coughed and decided to look at her feet. The view wasn't helping the situation.

'You _are_ high.'

'I'm just tired.' _You IDIOT, _Bethany felt like adding. Draco sprang down the rest of the steps while Bethany took her time, feeling stupider by the second. 'I'm sticking with my theory,' Draco said to himself.

Bethany was going to offer him a place to put his theory, but once more, concentrated on not hitting the floor with her head. 'You can go back to class,' really translated to; _Please leave me alone, _but he wasn't listening.

'Yeah,' he drawled. 'I could, but I'm not going to. You just got me out of the most boring class. I'm surprised no one else offered to get you out of there.'

Bethany shrugged. She knew exactly why no one else offered.

'So now instead of wasting my youth on boredom, I'm going to amuse myself somewhere very naughty and hopefully get caught so that I can get detention instead of going to herbology.' Draco flashed her a smile. Bethany returned a smile that said; 'Riiiight.'

'You do that.'

'Watch me.'

Bethany rolled her eyes. She had never remembered it taking so long to get to the hospital wing. She stopped suddenly, looking about herself. 'You prat,' she said incredulously. 'You took the long way.'

'There's a longer way if you want?' he offered innocently. 'You go out to the lake, then up to the astronomy tower, then back again, and take a few back staircases to the—'

Bethany felt herself getting angrier than usual. 'Lucky I didn't have a gaping head wound.'

'Too right,' Draco agreed with his hands in his pockets. 'You would have messed up the flagstones.'

The word frustrated did not even come close to describing how Bethany was beginning to feel. Draco just kept on talking. It was almost like he thought people liked to listen to him talk about complete bullshit. 'But then again, it is kind of bland up in this part of the castle, I've been telling Filch that we needed a new colour scheme for years now…not that I'm too much into red.' Draco turned and looked at her quizzically. 'Can you bleed green?'

'Not today.' Bethany couldn't take anymore. She decided to take herself to the hospital wing, edging past Draco with a look of aggravation on her face. 'Better luck next time.' She muttered.

'What's that?' The poor boy didn't seem able to take a hint. He followed her without a thought.

'Nothing,' she said automatically. _Nothing_ happened to be the most frequently utilized word in her vocabulary. Draco rambled for a little longer, eventually breaking Bethany's thoughts of _Why exactly is he following me…?_

'You're going the wrong way.' Bethany sighed. 'Oh I get it! You know a long way too!' Bethany sighed again, determined not to look over her shoulder. 'All this time I thought you should have been in Hufflepuff—'

'I'm not going the wrong way,' Bethany said darkly. 'This happens to be the quickest way there.' She stepped behind a tapestry and started walking down a spiral stairwell without bothering to explain. With any luck he would go back.

'Cool,' she heard a moment later, cringing. 'I never knew this was here.' Bethany turned around, the blood rushing from her head for a horrible moment. She swayed on the spot, seeing in the pale light how his smile turned to concern for a moment, just a moment. She ignored it. 'You can go back now,' she said as strongly as she could muster. 'I'm fine.'

Draco stepped past her silently, reaching up to take her arm again once he was on the step below her. 'Liar,' he said.

They didn't speak the rest of the way. She let him hold her arm, effectively keeping her head away from the flagstones, and she made gestures whenever he started going the wrong way, which was more often than would have been expected. _You have no sense of direction…_ she taunted within her head. There was no point saying it. There was no point saying a lot of things, so she didn't. Later on, while lying in the hospital wing in the hazy place between sleep and consciousness, she would wish that she had said something. Maybe he would have laughed. The possibility of it backfiring on her kept her from speaking. Why bother risking it? Just shut up.

'_Now_ you can leave,' she said finally, three steps away from a destination that she could have managed to find on her own in a quarter of the time.

'Alright,' Draco finally agreed, rubbing his hands together conspiratorially. 'I'm going to go burn something now.'

'Um, ok,' Bethany couldn't think of an appropriate answer. Her mind suddenly flew back to the books that she had left on her desk. 'I punched the Gryffindor password out of Longbottom.' Bethany sighed. The books were safe from flames, but most likely not safe from the prying eyes of Ashira and her band of merry bitches.

'So I'll see you in potions?'

Bethany shrugged. Did he actually sound hopeful? 'Probably.' Her mind flashed to her manga. It needed a character to kill off the one that Ashira had inspired. 'Icepick…' she muttered to herself.

'I think it's ageing potions today,' Draco continued gleefully. 'I'm going to get a picture for a fake ID.'

Bethany felt like saying 'You do that' again, but she just smiled, pushing the door to the hospital wing open. 'Bye.'

* * *

ummm... yeah. thanks for reading. Review if you wanna shrugs, waves like Nev in the 4th movie and walks away 


	3. Wrong again Nev

Okay, here's the 4th chapter. I wasn't gonna post it yet but lulu want's to read it. I don't know why tho. She practically wrote the whole thing.

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When Bethany pushed the door of the hospital wing open four hours later, she realised at once that madam Pomfrey had given her too much Pepper-Up Potion. The door hit the stone wall behind it with a loud thud. 'Sorry…' she mumbled, hurrying away. She had managed to sleep a little and did not feel quite so much like the floor wanted to be her best friend. The headache was gone too, but as she rushed down to the dungeons, she came to the horrible realisation that Draco may have been right. 'I'm high…' she said disbelievingly.

The tapestries looked a little too alive for her. _Just ignore it…_

'Hey Beth,' Bethany stopped abruptly at the bottom of a stairwell that led to the lower levels of the castle, having moved to take the left route. She cringed once more, clamping her teeth to keep from screaming. 'You're going the wrong way.'

'Catch.' Bethany no longer worried where her books had gotten to, they were flying towards her. 'Thanks,' she said awkwardly, stumbling into the wall behind her. 'I think…'

'I burned something really good in case you were wondering,' Draco said in a lower voice, stooping to pick up one of the books that had escaped her grasp. 'Just wait 'til Potter gets here.'

'I don't want to know.'

'You don't have a choice.' Bethany would have said something else, she had somehow managed to muster up some kind of bravery to speak out now that it seemed that Draco didn't hate her all that much, but she was cut off by his adding his own books to her pile. 'Oh look, here he comes now. Nice robes Potter!'

The Slytherin half of the class burst into peals of cruel laughter. Bethany shook her hair out of her eyes only to see Harry Potter being held back by his fan club. Half of his robes were missing, with suspicious singe marks on what was left. His eyebrows did not exactly look normal either.

'Actually I was trying to melt your glasses,' she heard Draco say apologetically. He shrugged. 'Sorry.'

'Oh, is that all?' Harry yelled sarcastically.

'Pretty much.'

'I'm going to kill you Mal—' Harry was cut off as the door to the Potions classroom opened. 'Fifty points from Gryffindor.'

'But Sir!' Ron Weasley protested.

'Make that One Hundred. Get inside.' Snape stepped back to allow the class to file in, offering an encouraging smile to Draco. Bethany had all but forgotten the travesty that had been her morning in History of magic as she tipped Draco's books back into his hands. Ashira made sure that she did not.

'Sir, Beth is very ill,' she said in a loud voice. 'I can't afford to get sick this close to exams…'

'Move,' Snape said without an ounce of effort, pointing towards the empty work table at the back of the room, preventing her from taking her usual assigned seat between Ashira and her dumbest friend, Gretel.

Bethany shrugged to herself. The only other person sitting this far from the front of the room was Neville Longbottom, who had taken a seat as far away from her as possible, right at the other end of the worktable. Solitary. Excellent.

'Page fifty-three,' Snape boomed, clearing the chalk from the last lesson from the blackboard with a wave of his wand. 'And do stop whining, Potter. You're lucky I didn't take more points for wearing incorrect uniform.'

Bethany sat down and opened her book, scanning the words quickly. It seemed easy enough, and for once there would be no one sitting with her to distract her or slip extra ingredients into her potions.

'I trust you can all read,' Snape said flatly, sitting down behind his desk. 'You have an hour, begin.' Bethany half expected Snape to put his feet up on the desk. He looked superiorly bored.

'That's green algae Nev,' Bethany monotoned after a sidelong glance at the shaking hands of her neighbour. 'The instructions say Blue.' Neville answered her by giving a start and coming close to falling off his chair. 'You're welcome.'

Bethany weaved her way through the other students to gather the ingredients that she needed from the cabinets that lined the walls and returned to her desk. On her way back she caught Draco's eye, he pointed towards Harry Potter and gave her a thumbs up, nodding to himself in self-satisfaction. 'Flamage,' Bethany commented, nodding her head towards the fire under his caldron, which was burning way too fiercely. Was he giggling?

'Wrong again, Nev,' Bethany sighed without even looking at the Gryffindor, lining up her ingredients in the order that they were to be added. This time he did fall off his chair. Bethany looked up to measure a level amount of newt blood just in time to see another thumbs-up coming her way.

_What can I say…_she thought to herself, smirking.

'Ten points from Gryffindor,' Snape said to himself, flipping a page of a book that seemed to be a lot more interesting than the class that he was meant to be supervising. 'For lack of concentration and ability to not annoy me. You're on the wrong page.'

Bethany decided to leave Neville alone. He looked like he wanted to throw himself off a turret. She knew what that felt like.

All went along fairly as usual from then on. Harry and Draco amused themselves by tossing random things at each other as Snape continued to shave points off of the Gryffindor quota and Hermione Granger spent the rest of the class telling them both to knock it off.

Bethany meanwhile, had come to the conclusion that she would rather sit alone for the rest of the year. In every class. It was most likely impossible, but she was toying with the idea of either building up enough courage to actually speak to the Potions master to have her place permanently moved, or else pretend to be sick for the rest of the year. Option two was more likely.

Half an hour later her potion was bubbling away, rapidly turning a dark shade of blue and emanating a swirling plume of black smoke. She resisted the urge to run her fingers through the smoke, knowing how stupid it would look to others. The smoke almost took on shapes and forms. She could have sworn there were eyes looking out at her, blinking and following her hand as she stirred the potion until it gradually turned purple. It took her mind off things to become lost in searching the smoke for images. It made her wonder what Draco's seeming obsession with fire was about, well, except for the obvious endeavour of making Potter's life a living hell.

'Perfect.' Bethany jumped. Snape didn't even bother stopping at her desk, he turned and headed in the opposite direction, checking the cauldrons in the back row for mistakes. There were many. He ignored Longbottom completely.

'It's green again, Nev.' Neville squeaked.

'Eeep!'

'You're welcome.'

'I did you a favour, Potter,' Bethany caught the middle of a cross-class conversation that was pretty much one-sided. 'Now you have two eyebrows.'

All hell suddenly broke out. There was an unexpected crash as a large bottle of dragon hearts exploded on its shelf nearby. Bethany had the sense to duck, abandoning her potion as she felt her heart give a jolt. Neville fainted.

Consequently Bethany heard a series of crashes and quite a lot of swearing. When it all eventually ended, the other girls stopped screaming, Ron and Hermione pushed each other off of themselves and started making strange excuses for having been forced into a compromising position beneath their desk. There was a large cloud of smoke near the front of the room, Draco and Harry either side of it, yelling about it being the other's fault.

'He tried to burn me to death!'

'He had one eyebrow!'

The smoke began to clear. Harry insisted that Draco be expelled. Draco insisted that he had only been trying to help. Amongst the confusion Bethany was the only person who dared to stand, she was staring at the smoke. While everyone else ignored it, too busy with shaking or commiserating over their destroyed potions, Bethany began walking slowly towards it until she was standing before it, the quarrelling boys either side of her.

'Shut-up,' she said bluntly without looking at them. Harry looked at her like he had never seen her before. Draco looked almost the same, wondering why she was so concerned. There was something in that smoke…

'Oh shit…' Draco breathed.

Bethany crouched down and held out her arms. A teary-eyed, confused looking three-year-old was lost in a pile of clothes as black as his hair and eyes.

'Professor?'

* * *

Well there you have it... If you couldn't see it comming then I'd have to call you a moron.


	4. Beef Stroganoff

Here, noble readers, is the fifth chapter. We (Youko and me) do not own Harry Potter. Review if you like it. Flame if you want me to curse you for all time. Have a smashing day.

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Realising that all was not right at the front of the room, the whole class rushed to the front to see what happened, this in turn caused a great rush of un-known people and thus fear for the already confused and now three year old potions professor. Who were all these people?

A small sniffle and a deep breath later, a loud wail resounded from the potions class room.

'Amazing,' Draco said quietly, looking over to Bethany. 'I have absolutely nothing smarmy to say…'

'What do we do?' Bethany asked instead of bothering to make any sort of response. 'This is not normal.'

'Ya think?'

'Shut up!' Draco yelled exactly what Bethany had wanted to scream at Harry Potter, who shrunk back, what was left of his eyebrows shooting up in fright. In the meantime everyone else in the class had ran back to their seats. Ashira for one was passing the time by screaming in sporadic intervals, which was not helping, because Severus was also screaming, the only difference was; he didn't pause to breathe.

'Serious, what do we do?' Bethany looked from Draco to the still screaming Severus, exasperated.

'I know what we can do!' A very bossy voice appeared beside Bethany as did quite a lot of red hair.

'Rack off.'

'You're not helping anyone, Malfoy.'

'Don't make me say it again, Weasel!' Draco warned, pointing a finger at Ron Weasley.

'And go away, Harmonica.'

'Honestly!' Hermione said indignantly, her hands on her hips. 'There are more important matter at hand here, Malfoy, I really think that we should all—'

'No body cares…'

Draco went on bickering with the Gryffindor trio for some time. Severus was turning blue in the face, finally pausing to breathe a few times just for good measure, while Bethany chewed her fingernails and tried to resist the urge to tell them all to shut the fuck up. She was about to say something, she wasn't quite sure what, but it was going to make a lot of sense, she was sure of it, only a moment later there was a rather disturbing development.

Looking for anything or anyone that might be familiar, Severus locked eyes with Bethany. _Mummy…_

'Mummy!' Yelled Severus as he ran into Bethany's arms.

Everyone shut up immediately. Harry Potter's eyebrows disappeared somewhere into his hairline.

'Now _that's _what I was aiming for!' Draco pointed and yelled at Harry gleefully, obviously forgetting the more important matters at hand.

'Draco!' Bethany reprimanded through her teeth, trying to shift the squirming baby in her arms. Severus was too occupied with burying his face in her hair to bother noticing anything else that was going on, his arms locked around her neck. 'I hate to break it to you, but our potions Professor just de-evolved a good thirty years and seems to be attached to me like a leech, care to help?'

'Oh Beth, I'll help—'

'I don't want your help, _Gryffindor!'_ Bethany snapped. Things had happened so quickly. She didn't even realize that her arms were starting to shake. She wasn't used to holding a baby of any kind, least of all one that was a professor mere minutes ago. She was on the verge of panicking and it seemed that no one else knew what to do. She gave a glance to Draco, who looked too paralysed with shock from her outburst to do anything. 'Fine.' Bethany turned on her heels and marched out of the room, other students rushing out of her way for the first and what she was sure would be the last time in her life.

Bethany heard someone calling her name behind her, but continued her way on the stairs up from the dungeons. She knew classes would be changing soon and the hallways would be full of students, students that would not be expecting to see Slytherin with a baby.

'Beth!' Bethany ignored Draco once more. 'Wait up! You're going the wrong way again!'

Bethany stopped, ready to turn around and yell. Instead, she waited for Draco to catch up and step in front of her, physically needing to keep her mouth shut to keep from calling him something that she would regret. 'Take the hall up here, all the classrooms are empty.' Bethany nodded, letting him lead her by the arm to a deserted hallway that would eventually lead to the headmaster's office.

'What are we going to tell him?' Bethany suddenly realized that she had no idea what she was going to tell Dumbledore, she wasn't even sure where she was going, she had never been to his office. She didn't have to ask how Draco knew the way so well, there were more singed things in the castle that she would ever have time to know about.

'Potter's fault.'

'That doesn't really explain a lot, don't' you think we should at least—'

'_Potter's fault,'_ he repeated. 'That's all he needs to know. He'll soon enough see Harry and his scorched robes and before we know it we'll be back to the common room to laugh about it over a nice—anything but pumpkin juice, I can't stand that shite. Do you like mango nectar?'

'Actually, yeah—hey! That's not the point!' Bethany stopped herself, noticing for the first time that Severus seemed to have fallen asleep on her shoulder. 'That's not the point!' she repeated, whispering this time. 'Tell him the truth or we won't be able to turn him back!'

'Maybe I don't want to,' Draco returned haughtily. 'He was going to fail me, bastard.'

'That's a lie. I know for a fact that you made beef stroganoff last lesson and he gave you a hundred and ten percent.'

'Yeah, but I wanted a hundred and _twenty_.' Bethany glared. 'All right, that was a lie too. Actually he tutors me during the summer, he knows I can brew anything. He lets me pass as long as I share my lunch.'

Bethany coughed. It was more of a shocked splutter, but she managed to cover it with a cough. 'I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that.'

'Denial is an ugly thing.'

'Listen Malfoy,' Bethany snapped. 'You can be as flippant as you want but a bloody teacher just turned into a baby and he doesn't seem to want to leave me alone any time soon, so you either help me or you can piss off!'

'Language, children…' Draco and Bethany's mouths fell open. Dumbledore had turned a corner and walked right past them, whistling to himself. They had not even realized that they had stopped to fight right outside his office. 'Password's chicken-clinker, by the way.'

Bethany waited until he had disappeared into his office to close her mouth. Her anger seemed to have dissipated. 'Don't make me go in there alone.'

'Come on,' Draco said in a softer voice, the circumstances of their situation seeming to finally sink in. 'He'll fix him right up.'

Bethany glanced down at Severus, noticing for the first time how vulnerable he looked, sleeping so soundly on her shoulder as if he were completely exhausted. His black hair was not as greasy as she was used to, falling all over his face in a messy mop of ebony. One of his hands was still knotted in her hair, unwilling to let go.

'Do you think so?' Bethany willed herself not to cry. Maybe they were doing him a favour. This was the first time she had ever seen him without a scowl on his face. She knew from her own experience and personality that there was no way that he had had a pleasant childhood.

'Of course,' Draco replied supportively when she looked up. 'And I'll kind of tell the truth,' he added, 'I swear.'

* * *

Well there it is! What will happen next? Will Severus ever get tall and ugly again? Will Draco tell the truth? Will Bethany ever tell anyone not to call her Beth? Will Dumbledore finally realize that he is in love with Hagrid and run away to Las Vegas to start a career in lounge singing? (You're a great audience--NEW YORK, NEW YOOOORK--I'm here til Thursday! Try the fricken chicken!)

Read next week to find out!

Peace homes.

For other great stories, check out Wildechild. She rocks.


	5. Luke, I am your father

For those of you brave enough to continue, here be-eth the next chapter. I own nothing, not even the shoes I am not standing in. Thanks for the reviews or lack of, seeing as I gave you a choice. Choice is important, without it, we would not have wonderful things like seagulls, downloadable music and re-runs of MASH.

Thanks for reading, peace out

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'So in conclusion,' Draco said after half an hour of non-stop explaining to the headmaster while in a Shakespearian pose just how Snape had become a child; 'It is all Potter's fault. The end.'

'Colourful as usual, Mister Malfoy,' Dumbledore said wearily, having been lost since Draco tried to explain the main subplots and narrative of Star Wars using Harry Potter's eyebrows as the main characters. 'Perhaps you have a more rational explanation, Miss Collins, try to keep it within five words.'

Bethany took a deep breath. 'Malfoy, Potter, explosion, smoke, shrinkage.'

Dumbledore sighed, relieved. 'Thank you from the bottom of my crossed eyes.'

Severus, meanwhile, who had just decided to wake up, was sitting in Bethany's lap with a tired expression of confusion on his face. He was staring at Dumbledore like he knew him, only not. 'Santa Clause…?'

'Dum-ble-doooor.'

'San-ta.'

'Dumbledore!'

'SANTA!'

'Alright,' Dumbledore said. 'Santa will do nicely. He's only tiny and already he thinks I'm an idiot…last time it took him seven years…' he added in an undertone, scratching his chin contemplatively. What to do, what to do…?

'I have no idea what to do.'

'I was sort of getting that impression,' Draco said. 'If you don't understand Star Wars, then there really is no hope for you.' Dumbledore ignored him. Bethany was trying very hard to ignore him, which was easy at this time because Severus was looking at her upside-down and pulling her hair. 'Muuuuum!'

'Don't call me that,' Bethany whispered harshly. 'You have to do something, headmaster, he thinks I'm his mother.' Saying it out loud made it all horribly real to Bethany. She started hyperventilating. 'I'm only seventeen years old!'

'Technically you are an adult in the wizarding world,' Dumbledore said sagely, not helping in any way.

'I don't care! I can't look after a baby—turn him back!'

'I have already stated that I cannot do that,' Dumbledore said, 'not yet, anyway. Until such time as I and the other professors can look into the exact formulation of the potion that has afflicted Professor Snape, there is nothing that I can do about this situation.'

Again, Dumbledore was not helping Bethany.

'Are you turning blue?' (AN. Violet, you're turning Violet! Hehehehehehehehe)

'Purple,' Bethany choked, standing up abruptly with Severus held awkwardly in her arms. 'I don't know the first thing about children. You have to take him.' Bethany tried to hold out Severus to Dumbledore, who heard Severus call him Santa with an evil grin. 'No thanks.' Bethany tried Draco.

'Babies hate me,' he said, backing away. 'My cousin tried to eat my Luke Skywalker figurine. Bit Han Solo's head off…so not happening again.'

'Severus seems to have formed an attachment to you,' Dumbledore said as Bethany sat down slowly, wondering if she was allowed to hit Severus if he pulled her hair again. He had failed her in third year for no good reason…

'Hungry,' Severus said. Nobody heard him.

'For the time being I implore you to please help us and look after him.'

'What about classes? Where am I going to put him? I can't keep a baby in a dorm full of stupid girls!'

'You will be provided with a private room.'

'Oh really? Sweet,' Draco said. 'I'll take him.' Bethany ignored him again. He was not helping like he said he would.

'And classes?'

'Well there won't be any potions for a while, so you'll only have to suffer through all the other ones with Severus.'

'That really helps,' Bethany said sarcastically.

'HUNGRY!' Severus articulated, kicking his legs.

Dumbledore looked at his watch. 'Well look at the time!' Draco narrowed his eyes. The headmaster was not wearing a wristwatch. 'You three had better go get some lunch, mind he doesn't choke on anything!'

'It's not lunchtime.'

'Dinner then! Out!' Dumbledore stood up and ushered them towards the door.

'I don't even know what babies eat,' Bethany said faintly, balancing Severus on her hip.

'You're about to find out.' Dumbledore held the door open for them. 'Ask the house-elves. Your things will be sent to your room.'

Bethany had had doors slammed in her face before, but never from a teacher, certainly not from the headmaster, and never with a hungry kid in her arms. It was weird. She wasn't quite sure what to say, or even if she should say anything even if she did feel like kicking the door down and leaving Severus with someone less likely to accidentally injure him. She then realized that dinner meant going to the great hall. The great hall meant students. Students meant teasing. This wasn't out of the ordinary. Mini professors were.

'Hold the baby Draco,' Bethany said desperately. 'I'm going to go kill myself.'

'I told you I don't hold babies,' Draco said matter-of-factly. 'You'll have to kill yourself later. Look on the bright side.' Bethany waited for him to elaborate. He couldn't think of anything. 'You might score me some house points…?'

'Score your own,' Bethany said, irritated. 'If you paid more attention instead of studying Star Wars and eyebrows you might not need other people to get points for you.'

'Harsh, Beth, very harsh. I put a lot of thought into my Star-brow theory.'

'You should have put some thought into NOT turning the professor into a kid with a hair fetish—ow!'

'I said…HUNGRY!'

'Fine,' Bethany sighed. 'Lets just get this over and done with.' She started to walk in the general direction of the great hall while Severus clapped and pulled faces at Draco over her shoulder.

'Um. I'm really not that hungry,' Draco said, making sure that his street cred wasn't ruined. 'You go ahead.'

Bethany didn't need to hear it twice. He didn't want to be seen with her. 'Whatever,' she said without bothering to turn around. It was probably better that she didn't analyze the situation any more than she needed to. He was in a completely different league to her.

'Come on Rus,' she said to Severus, who was too busy poking out his tongue to notice. 'Lets see if they have macaroni and cheese.'

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Thanks or reading. Review if you are nice or appreciate fine wines. Have a nice day. 


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